A recent Forbes Advisor survey asked 1000 divorced Americans what they felt could have saved their marriages. The responses were varied, but a significant percentage believed that their marriage could have been saved if they had taken certain actions.
Only a small number of respondents, 5%, felt that their marriage was beyond repair. It's important to explore the insights shared by those who have experienced divorce to gain a better understanding of what contributes to the success and failure of marriages.
Factors That Could Have Saved Marriage
1. Better Understanding of the Commitment of Marriage
According to the survey, 63% of respondents believed that a deeper understanding of the commitment required in marriage could have saved their relationship.
The concept of commitment may vary slightly between couples, but a study conducted at UCLA found that it generally refers to the willingness to make whatever effort necessary to ensure the success of the relationship. This includes providing emotional support and weathering the inevitable challenges and changes that will arise throughout the course of a life together.
2. Better Understanding of Their Partner
One of the most important factors in the success of a marriage is having a deep understanding of one's partner. According to the survey, 56% of respondents believed that having a better understanding of their partner's values and morals prior to marriage could have saved their union.
This goes beyond knowing their favorite movies or hobbies and delves into their core beliefs and morals. Couples who engage in regular, honest communication are more likely to develop a deep bond of understanding that can serve as a solid foundation for their marriage. Research has shown that couples who communicate positively and effectively are relatively satisfied with their relationship.
3. Waiting Longer to Start a Family
Starting a family is a desire that many couples share, but some divorcees believe that waiting before having children could have been beneficial for their marriage. According to the survey, 44% of respondents believed that waiting could have saved their marriage.
In some cases, this delay may have allowed couples to establish a strong and lasting relationship before starting their family. The benefits of waiting longer included better family stability, living better off in today’s high standard of living, and having better parenting skills.
4. Seeking Professional Help
Many couples often disregard or fail to consider professional help, such as couples counseling, until it's too late. Recent research has shown that seeking couples therapy earlier in the relationship might have made a significant difference for 42% of divorcees.
In fact, couples therapy positively impacts 70% of couples receiving treatment. Therapists can assist couples in identifying any underlying issues, building healthy communication patterns, and setting goals for sustaining a healthy relationship. By recognizing the potential benefits of professional help early on, couples can potentially prevent future issues and improve the quality of their relationship.
5. Waiting Longer to Get Married
When it comes to marriage and divorce, time seems to play a crucial role. As revealed in the survey, 40% of divorcees believed that waiting longer to get married may have saved their marriage. In addition, there is research that may support this response.
According to a study, waiting at least three years before tying the knot reduces the likelihood of divorce by 50%. This is because during the early stages of a relationship, it can be difficult to truly understand the complexities of a lifelong commitment. By spending more time getting to know one another, couples are more likely to make a well-informed decision when deciding to marry.
Get Help from Our Divorce Attorneys
Although we cannot change the past or undo the choices made in unsuccessful marriages, we can learn from the experiences of divorced individuals to strengthen and protect our own relationships.
By drawing on their knowledge, we can equip ourselves with valuable insights and strategies to navigate the challenges that may arise. If you are currently going through a divorce, consider reaching out to the compassionate and knowledgeable divorce attorneys at the Law Office of Alexandra White, PC. We can provide guidance and support as you navigate this complex journey.
Get in touch with us online or call today at (303) 647-4245.