Addiction is a psychological illness that is as pervasive as any other disease. It can manifest itself in many ways, from the use of alcohol and drugs to engaging in compulsive gambling or sexual relationships. The obsessions that addicts develop are inevitably going to lead to tensions in a marriage. This is because addicts will tend to prioritize their addiction above anything else, including finances and their children's well-being.
If you are struggling in your marriage as a result of your spouse's addiction problems, you may be confused about which road to take. It is likely that you still love and care for your spouse very deeply, but at the same time, you may feel that some of the actions they have taken are unforgivable. Only you can decide whether you should proceed with a divorce. However, the following are some things that you may want to consider.
Is your mental health suffering as a result of the relationship?
As the spouse of an addict, it is likely that you have put their needs before your own for a significant amount of time. It is important, however, that you consider your own well-being and mental health. If you are not taking good care of yourself, it will be difficult or impossible for you to take care of others. Going through a divorce may actually help you to be a more supportive friend to your spouse.
Would your children benefit overall from a divorce?
While no child wants to see their parents divorce, a separation may benefit them in the long-run. This is especially true if they witness the effects of your spouse's addiction regularly.
Is your spouse enabled by the security of marriage?
The financial and emotional security of a marriage can enable addiction, in many cases. You should consider whether the shock of a divorce filing might serve as an impetus for your spouse to make a change for their future.
It is important to seek counseling or therapy for issues relating to addiction. Additionally, it is wise to plan ahead if you are considering filing for a divorce in Colorado so that you can get the best possible result.